Hatoful Boyfriend -- No Spoiler Review
Hatoful Boyfriend
System: PC, PS4+PSVita
Price: $9.99, $9.99 (for both PS4 and PSVita)
Voice Acting: No
ESRB Rating: E (10+)
Overall Rating: Stole 8/10 ♥s
Pre-Game Perception: Dating pigeons. The premise is the joke, so the entire game is bound to keep needling at the absurdity of dating sims with birds.
Morning-After Reflection: Way more than I expected from a game promoted as a joke with surprisingly deep characters that tackle surprisingly heavy topics, and they’re birds.
Story: “Congratulations! You’ve been accepted as the only human student at the prestigious St. PigeoNation’s Institute, a school for talented birds! Roam the halls and find love in between classes as a sophomore student at the world’s greatest pigeon high school. Finding happiness won’t be easy, but it’s not all academic - there’s always time for a little romance in this delightful remake of Hato Moa’s popular visual novel / avian dating sim Hatoful Boyfriend!
Please Note: No birds were hurt in the making of Hatoful Boyfriend. In fact, many found love.”
Interest Rating: 3/10. Okay, I know this game is supposed to be a joke, but I couldn’t believe it was as good as everyone was saying. I had no interest in it until it went on sale for $2, and I figured I could spend $2 for a game so highly rated as this one was because I’m cheap.
MC: Hiyoko Tosaka is our everyday 16-year old heroine, or something like that. Both names can be changed, and, unfortunately, you’re prompted with the ability to change the name every new game you start, and there are a lot of new games to start. Since this game is not voiced, and the CGs are… a little different, there are no pictures or references for Hiyoko. At all. She is completely removed from the game visually; which is likely by design judging from the way the rest of the game is constructed. We do know that the game is in Japan, so she is likely Japanese, but other than that, there is never a reference to what Hiyoko physically looks like except that she is human. Maybe she has four arms? Maybe she has one eye? Who knows? I’m perfectly fine with the lack of detail on the MC, because it gives self-inserters the ability to construct whatever image they want in regards to the character they’re playing. And that’s pretty cool.
Hiyoko remains much of a mystery through the whole game. Besides those presented to us, she appears to have no friends. She lacks familial relationships through most of the game, with it being covered in only one route. And despite having the ability to join a club for school, she seems to have no actual hobbies or ambitions, giving the player the possibility of making her any way they want. Surprisingly, being as paper-thin as she is, Hiyoko has a great personality that I felt really came through in all her interactions. She’s funny, witty, confused, reasonable, normal in this den of oddities that is Hatoful Boyfriend, and the writing makes her so incredibly likeable to me. I don’t feel Hiyoko was written childishly, nor do I think she’s too mature for her 16-years of age. She’s ultimately ideal for the scenario she was designed for, and I can’t imagine even my best girl MCs filling this role so flawlessly.
Likability Rating: Yu. Hiyoko is exactly what the game needs, and it is easy for me to enjoy her humor and reasoning. Despite being perfect for the game, she doesn’t do well standing on her own, and falls flat compared to other MCs.
Plot: Haha, yeah, it’s a bird dating sim. So funny. You probably are looking at picking this game up as a joke, because a human girl is romancing pigeons in a school known for having the best education for birds. I know I did. My friends all laughed and waited for me to play it so we could all laugh at how much Hatoful Boyfriend parodied other, more conventional otoge. And you get that. You get all the funny things you think are going to happen. I laughed so hard I cried with this game. The writing is amazing. But you get a lot more to it than boyfriends birdfriends. You get an entire experience that I didn’t expect from a game that has been memed over and over again as a joke about birdbois.
There’s not a whole lot I can say about it, since the story speaks for itself once you do actually start playing. I think the beauty of Hatoful Boyfriend is that there is both so much and so little there. The common route is short, but also the longest part of the game. You will be repeating this over and over again to get on each route, and it can get tedious, but bear with it. At least there are different options to choose for the first few times through, and you’ll learn where you can use the fast-forward feature after your third run-through. For the most part there is an overall plot that you get to unfurl the more routes you do in the game. The secret route wraps up the whole story, but still shares a common route, so you’re not getting away from that initial part.
Replayability Rating: ★★★☆☆ The common route gets tiresome when you’ve ran through it ten times, but each birb is well worth it. Strategic saving can save you some of the repetitiveness, a feature I barely used due to the short length of the game coupled with the fast-forward feature.
Love Interests: Oh boy bird! Are you ready for some avian lovin’? You’ll soar to new heights with these eight feathery fellows, some old, some young, some who-knows-what. I really know very little about birds and their lifespans except that parrots can live longer than a human. But what about pigeons, doves, swallows, and partridges? I have no idea! So when it comes to these LIs, your guess is as good as mine, and I played the game. I guess I wasn’t too focused on this aspect of the delicious denizens of Hatoful Boyfriend.
The game is pretty straight-forward in execution for routes. Choose to be around the birdie of your dreams, and also study the best subject for that LI. There are some guidelines for the stat-raising section, which is incredibly easy so don’t fret. Some LIs have two endings, some have only one. The game starts with seven romanceable birds, plus one friendship route that isn’t advertised. After some point (that cannot be agreed upon by several guides) you open a secret character, giving you eight LIs and 1 friendship birb. Then, then! I’m going to let the pigeon out of the pie. There’s a secret route that also gets unlocked, but no additional LIs. There is no set route order, and even after playing, I don’t think there’s an order I’d recommend except doing Ryouta first, and maybe Shuu last. But even that is debatable. I did, however, play in a specific order that was recommended to me, so I’ll introduce you to your dateable dudes that way. I’m leaving out the friendship route because there’s so little about her, and her route is kind of ham-fisted into the game that I don’t even count it as a route.
Do you like the childhood friend route? If you do then Ryouta Kawara is the boy bird for you. You both enrolled in St. PigeoNation’s Institute the same year and have a history together before being invited to this prestigious school. He’s the first boy birdie you meet when you start the game, and a great route to start on. There is only one ending for Ryouta, and it’s pretty easy to achieve, plus you get a feel for all the little birdie boys and-- No, there are no birdie girls introduced in this school. Oh well, you get to know the cast of characters if you start with Ryouta, but it also sets the mood of the game. Don’t pass him up.
Sakuya Le Bel Shirogane is the elite of the elite in France, and for some reason he is this year’s new transfer student to St. PigeoNation’s Institute. As long as you don’t mind his stuck-up attitude, he’s actually not a bad boy bird to be around. I found his pompous attitude amusing, and it added to the overall feel of his route. He looks every bit the nobleman noblebirdie he is in his human form (a feature the game offers when first introducing everybirdie). I wasn’t totally into the design, but I liked his story enough to get the feel goods from it. Sakuya has two endings, but if you get the true ending there’s little reason to do the other except for achievements and unlocking of the epilogue to the secret route (which I highly recommend you do because it completes the game).
If you want the most ridiculous of LIs, go for Okosan. I’m sure he’s charming in his own way, but he is the epitome of this parody of a game. I guess he’s supposed to be the comedic relief, and he accomplishes that in spades feathers. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t dislike the guy, he’s just a very special sort of special and this route encompasses that special. It’s good to throw him in the middle of the game in order to remind yourself why you’re really here. This is the birb you came for. Okosan has two endings, but like Sakuya’s there is very little reason to get the second if you accomplished the true ending on your first try, except for achievements and unlocking the epilogue to the secret route (which I highly recommend you do because it completes the game).
Next up is the sleepyboi sleepybirb Kazu(y)aki Nanaki. Why’d I put the optional ‘y’ in his name, you ask? Well, even if you didn’t I’m going to tell you. Because I’m not sure if it’s supposed to be there or not. Throughout the game it is written as Kazuaki, but every once in a while they’ll drop a ‘y’ in there for Kazuyaki. I’m betting there’s some cultural joke to it that I simply don’t get, because many of these names are jokes by themselves if you take the time to look up a few of them. I thought I was really going to like Kazuaki, because not only is he the teacher (can we say power dynamic?), but he seemed rather smart and sweet as well. And he was sweet. This route was such a breath of fresh air, but it certainly didn’t go the way I thought it was going to. He’s still a good boy bird, and I’ll take my chances again if I ever consider Mr. Nanaki in the future.
Who doesn’t like introverts? What about quiet boys birds you find in the library that look sad and are mysterious? Nageki Fujishiro meets all the marks. I sometimes wonder if he’s more interested in literature than Hiyoko’s company, but it’s nice spending time with this dove in any case. You don’t get to see Nageki much if you aren’t aiming to, since he’s not in your class, unlike all other birbs introduced so far. So don’t pass up this route and your opportunity to get to know this sweet boi bird. He easily tops the charts as best boy bird.
Here is where I originally did Shuu, but I think there’s slightly more impact if you play Yuuya first, so let’s get to know Yuuya Sakazaki. He’s an upperclassman, so another character that isn’t in your class, and really, we don’t get to see much of him either due to that. It turns out he is quite the flirt, and his laissez-faire attitude draws a lot of people in. I was okay with Yuuya, I’m sure he’s quite the guy, but there were definite favorites of mine before I finally made my way to his route, and his route was only okay for me. He does, however, have my favorite human form aesthetic out of the bunch. Such a sexy dove.
Lastly, we have Shuu Iwamine, or better known to us as the creepy doctor. There’s no denying that it was the artist’s intention to give Shuu a bit of the creep factor, but only a bit. He turned out to be one of my favorite characters, along with about half of the other boys birds that have been offered up to us. You see more of Shuu than you do any of the other LIs that are outside of your class, but that makes sense since he’s part of the staff of the school and the others are students. The guide I read suggested Shuu before Yuuya, but also mentioned that it’s a matter of preference, and I think I would have preferred keeping this chonky partridge for last. He has two ends, but like all the others, if you end up on the true end first, there’s little reason to do the second ending save for achievements and unlocking the epilogue (which I suggest you do because it completes the story).
Boy Crazy Rating: 88%. I have joined the bird boyfriend army. It’s easy to enlist, just pick up Hatoful Boyfriend and you are certain to find a man bird you love. I’m certainly keeping a few of these as husbandos. And I never thought I’d say this, but I would fight for these birbs.
Romance: Hatoful Boyfriend is a parody of otoge. Because of this the game turns out more slice-of-life, comedy, and drama rather than romance. There is just a tiny bit of romance, but I wouldn’t consider this a romance game. I think it is listed as an otome because it is 1) designed for women; 2) a parody of the genre of otome; and 3) you do actually pursue some fowl. Although I talk about how little the romance in the game is, there is a lot of love. Self-love, familial love, platonic love, even love for humanity; and yes, there is a smidge of romantic love, but the rest greatly eclipse the latter. If I count in all the love, this game gets a higher rating than typically what I’d consider part of the romance rating, and I really want to give it the higher rating. It’s got the feels, yo. There’s a lot more to this game than watching Hiyoko fall in love with these boys birds, you’ll likely fall in love with them, I know I did.
Heart Palpitation Rating: B+. It may not be the typical romance, but it has the warm and fuzzies. There’s a lot of love in this game, despite the word being used so very little. I’d give it an ‘A’ if I wasn’t burdened with counting in the romance portion, which is so tiny that if I only considered that, it would be a ‘F’.
Spice: They’re birds. No. Just no. There is no spice to be found here. I mean, I suppose there’s a joke or two about plumage and tight clinging feathers, but… ya’ know what? If you want to count that, sure! There’s spice. But I’m taking no part. I wash my hands of this.
As a side note: what happens to a bird if it eats something spicy?
Cold Shower Rating: Fail. Some people just really love birds, okay?! I’m not one of those people. No cold shower needed, not even a cold birdbath.
Angst: You might be surprised at how hard the life of a bird can be, I know I was. I was fully expecting a rather shallow game in order to keep the comedy high, but the characters are incredibly deep, and with that depth comes the dark murky waters where the sun doesn’t shine. Really though, this is not an angst-filled game, but it is angstier than I expected, and touching on moderate-high for the draaaaaamaaaaas. There are no depicted scenes of violence, however, there are descriptions of violence in the text. And that’s all I have to say about that. #ForrestGump
Drama Llama Rating: 7.5/10 Is the drama llama glaring or staring? It’s hard to tell. But we do know that whatever its intentions are are not for the best for us. Approach with caution.
Voice Acting: None. How would birds even sound if there was voice acting? Would it just be whistles, or cooing? I’ll keep their little bird voices in my head, thank you.
Expression Rating: N/A. Nothing to rate here.
Art: Hatoful Boyfriend is an interesting combination of extremely cartoony backgrounds with real photos of birds overlaid as the sprites for the game. That’s about all I can say about that. I mean, there’s nothing wrong with the backgrounds, or real birds for sprites, but it’s not something I’ve seen in a world full of different art-styles. Each bird comes with one bird photo, so there are no pose changes. However, there are… some… costume changes in the game. Trust me, you’ll notice when those happen. I’m not an ornithologist, or an avid birdwatcher, so some of these good birds looked the same to me (there are five white doves).
Still Picture Rating: ★★★☆☆ Many birb. Such birb. Very birb.
CGs: There really aren’t any, to be honest. You do have a gallery section of the game, and you do get pictures in that gallery, but none of them are the CGs we know or expect. Most of them are the ending pictures, which are the same as their corresponding achievement on Steam. There are a few goodies that I'm willing to spoil you on one, but overall, these are not the birbs you are looking for.
Look at this Photograph Rating: 55% Since consistency between reviews is a big deal to me, this section’s rating ends up rather low. Unfortunately low quantity, as well as unfortunately low quality.
UI/Mechanics: The most basic of basic UIs. The main menu has a gallery, an archive, load, and new game. There are no controls for sounds or music. There is no button map, but the commonly used Enter works as expected with Enter advancing the story. Escape also gets rid of the textbox in order to take better screenshots or just admire the scenery. Clicking also works, but I’d rather hit Enter than have my hand on a mouse; more airflow.
As for mechanics, it’s a standard VN for the most part. There is a small stat raising portion, but it’s super easy to manage, you simply pick a class to attend roughly four times and get your stats up that way. This apparently has something to do with getting certain character routes, but I just studied what the spoiler-free guide told me to do when I was aiming for a certain boy bird and didn’t test whether or not the stats mattered. As a note, the fast-forward button doesn’t stop at unread text, so pay attention to when you’re using it. You might blow through story you haven’t seen if you’re not careful. Also, I couldn’t find a backlog of any sort, so if you happened to speed by text, you’re just screwed, and not in the fun way.
What’s this button do? Rating: C. With no button map, no sound options, and a fast-forward that isn’t intuitive to stop at new text, the game is acceptable with UI/Mechanics, but not much more. It gives the basics, so it gets a basic grade.
Errors: I didn’t encounter it, but friends who were playing this game at the same time I was complained that they had a saving/loading issue. Apparently, if they saved, then tried to play further, the game would not load anything. Another said there was a known bug where the saves would not be there when reopening a game. I saved before closing once, and loaded just fine. Not to say this isn’t a thing, simply that I didn’t recreate it. I had one crash when I left the game running but minimized for more than 30 minutes. I opened it back up and everything was frozen, then the whole thing crashed and self-closed likely from my repeated clicking to get the story to advance. Luckily, I had saved a choice or two earlier. I also found that a certain save I had would load improperly so that there was no text box or way to advance the story, or visit the menu, or anything else. I had to hard close it and not use that save due to the same improper loading that happened causing the same results each time I attempted to load that file. Other than that, it’s translated rather well, with less than 20 word errors where a word was missing. And I’m pretty sure there was one misspelling, and one misused tense. That’s it. Pretty great quality when it comes to translation and execution, that is, unless you get the saving bugs.
Here there be Bugs Rating: Pass. It’s possible there’s an annoying queen somewhere in this mess, but I can’t find her. For now there’s no colony to speak of.
Background Music: The BGM is surprisingly good. When I purchased my copy of the game off Steam, I must have gotten the deluxe or collectors or whatever edition (as if there were more than one available) because I got the OST, the artbook, and some comic along with it. I enjoyed the music they added to the game, and I enjoy some scores from the OST as well. I have an instrumental playlist that my favorite wordless songs get put on, and six of the 100 are from this game. I’d say that’s pretty good!
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