Cafe Enchante -- No Spoiler Review
Café Enchanté
System: Switch
Price: $49.99
Voice Acting: Yes (Japanese)
ESRB Rating: T (13+)
Overall Rating: Stole 5/10 ♥s
Pre-Game Perception: Restaurant to Another World the dating game. Upbeat and fluffy, it’s probably going to cover a lot of food.
Morning-After Reflection: A poorly paced otoge about a busybody café owner causing problems for the regulars of Café Enchanté when she inherits it from her grandfather.
Story: When Kotone inherits her grandfather’s Tokyo café, she discovers the shop holds more secrets than anyone could imagine. The café is a meeting spot for beings from multiple, mystical worlds. You’ll meet the king of demons, a humanoid beast, a fallen angel, and more. And when government agents monitoring non-human activities show up at your door, your new café is about to become a lot more colorful.
Interest Rating: 4/10. I suppose Café Enchanté was doomed from the start because the premise didn’t interest me to begin with. Fluffy slice-of-life has never been my thing, I like the drama and tears. However, I bought it because it was one of the few recently localized otoge from a company that brought me my favorite games, so I supported the industry and was willing to give it a shot.
MC: Have you ever wondered what one of these otoge would be like if the MC was completely normal? Like, nothing special at all. Utterly normal with nothing they’re good at and more things that they can’t do than they can, surrounded by amazing men that only further highlight the disparity between them? I haven’t, but someone apparently had and thus Kotone Awaki was brought into MC existence. Kotone’s first name can be changed, but if you don’t change it then the characters will voice it. Her last name must remain the same for story purposes. She is not voiced, herself. Kotone has a full-sized sprite that very, very, very rarely shows up on screen, and a sprite that hangs out next to the textbox. She is likely very short, judging from the CGs that she is in, but it’s practically impossible to tell since no one has a height listed in this game and most CGs are at “interesting” angles. Kotone’s probably close to 5’ even, with a very slight build, brown hair, and pink eyes.
I know what you’re thinking, “Pink eyes? How can someone with pink eyes be normal?” Well, if you weren’t thinking it, now you are, and I assure you, they can be extraordinarily normal if we just pretend that pink is a normal eye color. At 19, Kotone has some small experience with the world, but because her grades sucked in school (a testament to her intelligence) she got an office job that she was grateful was provided to her. It seems the work environment was less than ideal - this matters to show you just how average she is. When she moved to Tokyo to run the café, she literally had panic attacks when her former employer would call. She apparently has issues setting up basic electronics (like connecting to wifi), she finds mathematics difficult, and for the most part she needs a lot of help and guidance from those around her. This is not an issue for me. I wouldn’t expect a 19-year old to be able to take over a café, especially if they barely made it through high school. The thing is, she is so helpless. Apparently her only strengths are remaining optimistic, cooking, and cleaning. That’s. It.
Kotone is a true damsel in distress at most times. And when she’s not, she’s usually partaking in overthinking simple situations that could easily be cleared up by communicating. A strength that wasn’t listed for her in-game. Sometimes she likes to push her beliefs onto others, certain that her overthinking has revealed how someone else must truly feel deep down; though they deny it, she must be right. Another strength. And every once in a while, she likes to mix things up a bit by inadvertently exacerbating a situation because she’s not all that quick-witted or bright (as we found out because her grades and general confusion when things get slightly complex).
Likability Rating: Nin. The story suffers from having to go at Kotone’s pace. With her lack of problem solving and useful skills, her assertion on including herself in every clearly dangerous situation keeps the game rolling, but reflects poorly on our MC. She comes off helpless, selfish, and the root of most conflicts, or at least problematic to the resolution.
Plot: Café Enchanté doesn’t have a real plot. There, I said it. It has a long common route of eight chapters, giving the LIs themselves only four - except Misyr who gets six. But the problem is the common route flounders around in these tiny stories of conflict for eight chapters, and they are so poorly paced that I thought I might be narcoleptic. I seriously fell asleep a dozen times, easily, while trying to get through the pointless build up to each LI route… which the common route actually has nothing to do with the plot of the LI routes.
When you finally snag a LI route, you’ll find things don’t really improve. Each LI route is different, but the LIs are surprisingly sparse for their own routes at least 50% of the time as the story meanders through three chapters of filler that I suppose is set-up and character building. You know, what the common route is typically for. Giving us one solid chapter of plot, conflict, climax and resolution. Il and Misyr are exempt from this for some reason, which is nice. They both get an actual story that fills up more than one chapter, and I greatly appreciate that.
If I could sum up the plot of Café Enchanté, it would probably be the sad lives of non-humans. It’s vague and not helpful at all just like the game, but that’s the best way to describe what this game is really about.
Replayability Rating: ★★☆☆☆ I was so tired of Café Enchanté that this is the first game I played through and didn’t 100%. I wasn’t going to spend anymore time putting myself to sleep while nothing interesting happened.
Love Interests: This is actually an interesting portion for me, because some LIs faded into the background during the common route, but really shined in their own route; while others were awesome characters in the common route (or even other LI routes) but brought little to the table in their own. I liked a lot of them more on their own, not dealing with Kotone, than I did actually paired with the MC of the game. And the game certainly set up the poster boy as their favorite, really not giving some of the others the care and attention I believe they deserved. Ultimately, the writing brought my opinion of the LIs down quite a bit, and that’s unfortunate, because I think if there was more given to us about these men then they’d be in a much better position.
The only route that is locked at the beginning of the game is Misyr’s, as is often the norm when it comes to Otomate games (leaving one character to unlock). There is a recommended order of going Canus > Ignis > Rindo > Il > Misyr. Honestly, I don’t see a point in doing anyone’s in any order, since none of them seem to really have spoilers for other routes. Yeah, you learn some things that involve some plots or characters, but nothing that really matters for the plot or characters being focused on during that route. I suppose Il’s route might be best right before Misyr’s only because of two reveals that have such little impact, but still, some might not like knowing what’s going on. Personally, I’d do Ignis > Il > Rindo > Canus > Misyr if I ever were to test my threshold for death through boredom run through this game again. So, on that note, I’m going to introduce the dudes by my order, but decide for yourself what would be best for you.
That puts the beast boy up first. Ignus Carbunculus is one of those characters that sort of fades into the background in the common route. He’s a hot-headed tsundere-- No, literally hot headed. He is a Firewolf beastman from Beastia and has literal flames coming off his body, which are constantly referred to as being hot and used for warmth, but there are other times where he should be clearly sizzling nearby friends, however he doesn’t cause any heat damage to those around him. So metaphorically he’s more impolite than hot-headed, and doesn’t really tsun much, especially when it comes to the MC. But archetypes don’t have to be 100% represented, and he covers the bases enough to count… I guess. Basically, Ignis eats and gets mad at Il for staying in his room, and that’s pretty much all there is to him until his route when you get to learn of his past and what really makes him tick. I didn’t like much about this game, but Ignis was my third liked route, so take that however you wish.
Best boy Il Fado de Rie is who I’d suggest next, mainly because I think his is the best story of the game and lining up three stories that bored me to tears really isn’t the way I’d want anyone to play this game, not that I want anyone to play this game. The problem is that even though this was the best story, it was still deeply flawed, but at least we got more of Il. Il also fades into the background in a lot of chapters and routes of this game. That’s probably because he’s basically playing otoge in his room, or hanging out and playing otoge while everyone else talks. Oh, I should probably mention he’s a fallen angel… that seems like it might be important to know so you don’t see the wings and go “What the actual f*ck?” But that’s not what makes me love this cinnamon roll. He’s rather awkward and doesn’t understand humans or emotions, plus he’s an otome otaku! I can’t possible be the only person that relates with Il. Dating myself does get weird, but it was also super easy to good end so I didn’t have to suffer backtrack through a bad end.
Kaoru Rindo is the only human in this group, which is nice to have as a romance option rather than only people from other worlds. Thing is, he’s 42 while Kotone is 19, so if age gaps bother you then Rindo might be difficult to get through. The good news is by this point you should have an idea of how much romance is not in this game, so you don’t really have to worry about the gappers hooking up. That sounds vaguely dirty... I had no issue with the age gap, as I don’t tend to, so the only problem I had with the route was the route itself. Rindo is probably the most consistent character in the game, so I don’t feel he was better or worse on his own route. The writers, however, seem to not want these two to get together too easily, as everyone appears to be against them, including themselves. At least this wasn’t what I thought was the worst route, but it is still rather disappointing, imo.
This was the worst route, imo. This is where the LI was much more interesting and likable outside of his own route. Canus Espada is a character that I really like. I enjoy the role he plays in the group, and I find him reliable in everyone’s route. I think he’s rather great, and I do like that voice of his as well. Then we get onto his route and… and it isn’t about him. It is literally an entire story about someone else and he is the most absent out of all LIs from his own route. He plays a part, sure, but we miss out on romancing this literal knight in intimidating armor that appears to have a heart of gold-- no! Something softer than gold. A gold-colored sheep plushie! Since I thought this route was the biggest snooze-fest, having it at the end of the list made sense to me, so you knew you were just one away from getting to Misyr, if that was your goal in playing this game. I had played him first and nearly quit the game several times. It literally took me three months to get through the common route and Canus’ route together. He’s still a good boy even if his route sucked.
Save the (second) best for last? Not that we have much of a choice, since it takes everyone’s good end being completed to unlock Misyr’s route. So now you’re here. Finally. It’s been a journey, but you’re not over yet. Now you get six chapters to go through! But to me they didn’t feel so incredibly long, perhaps because there was plenty of content and the story kept moving, it wasn’t just a bunch of random encounters that filled up time, imo. I do believe the first chapter was a bit long, but then it picked up. The game attempts to keep Misyr hidden behind the curtain like the Wizard of Oz to keep up his air of mystery, and even his portion of the common route gives little to nothing away about him. So I thought it was nice that we were finally going to get something here. And we did. It’s a story. It’s not bad. It’s just Misyr’s story, and Kotone happens to be involved in it. Which I’m more than used to by now, she usually just tags along anyway.
Boy Crazy Rating: 80%. The MC and writers dictate how we feel about characters, and they didn’t really want us falling in love with many. I rarely turn out a husbando, so they’re welcome to my harem, but I’m almost more interested in the side characters than I am this group. They’re fine for some fun, but they’re low on my list of favorites.
Romance: How much romance do you think can fit into something that appears to be a slice-of-life game? The first mistake is assuming this is slice-of-life, because it is far from everyday life and fluffy moments; it is more a supernatural adventure game in VN format. With that in mind, there is the barest of romance. I found most of it unbelievable, and I totally pushed the “I believe” button on relationships formed in under 10 days in other stories. The thing is, Kotone (MC) appears to never understand she has feelings for someone until someone else tells her. That’s when the overthinking comes in that I mentioned up in the MC section of my review. Plus, we don’t get to see the LIs really show an interest in Kotone because they’re busy dealing with the plot for their route. So basically it just happens. And I’m going, “But why?” There is nothing that ever indicates a seedling of affection, and then suddenly we have a tree of love like it was there the whole time.
Heart Palpitation Rating: D+. There was one route that gave me feels, and not even a lot of them. Everything else was too shallow to move my heart of stone.
Spice: I think we can all agree that white rice is the least spicy thing on Earth, except for maybe water. In this case Café Enchanté could be one or the other. Is it rice? Or is it water? Whatever it is it has absolutely no spice and no flavor either. It must be water in that case. The only time I got excited was clearly at a point that normal people would not get excited, but I’m quite the deviant when it comes to the status quo so I’m not surprised. You do get some kiss CGs, but it’s not spicy, it’s just obligatory. And that’s it.
Cold Shower Rating: Fail. I mentioned more than once how often I fell asleep to this game, it’s no surprise that the thought of cooling down never occurred to me. Jump in the shower to heat up from this icy game.
Angst: We’ve covered that Café Enchanté is not a fluffy game, but that doesn’t mean it’s super angst-ridden either. I found the drama to be very middling because some of it was manufactured simply by making mountains out of mole hills, and some of it was actual mountains. There is a good amount of minor character death in this game, most referenced and rarely described in detail through text. We do get only a few scenes with blood displayed in the art. Since the game is plot-heavy, there is a lot of conflict, and plenty of fighting, but described only, unless you count sprites in a violent pose. Each LI has some sort of angsty situation in their past or present, so that does add to the drama. For the most part, however, it really does feel melodramatic to me. I had a hard time actually believing the danger or angst of the situation.
Drama Llama Rating: 6/10. The drama llama is moody and might spit if you look at it the wrong way. Angsty LIs and violence keep this rating from falling into the fluffy-stuffy rating.
Voice Acting: One of the few redeeming factors of this game, but not enough to save it, imo. I’d like to give props to Ishikawa Kaito (石川 界人), the voice of Il Fado de Rie, our soft-voiced fallen angel. Now, if you’ve read any of my other reviews, you’d know that this seiyuu comes up a few times. Ishikawa Kaito voiced Dante from Piofiore, Hikage from Psychedelica of the Black Butterfly, and Elric from Psychedelica of the Ashen Hawk, and every time I hear him in a new role I’m roped into the character because the way he manages to express himself by tone and tempo makes the character believable to me. There are some other good names in this game that managed to bring some life to their characters, including side characters-- no, not just including. Some of the best voice acting in this game involved the side characters, letting them steal the show in scenes they were in.
Expression Rating: Yu. We have some talent here, and I look forward to hearing them in the future, but it didn’t wow me to the point that I need to follow these seiyuu from game to game.
Art: The art for this game is actually really, really good. The backgrounds have an exorbitant amount of detail. The sprites are all individualized with details that really express each character’s personality. I really like all the art. They’re clean drawings with dark lines and that is certainly my favored type of art style. Each sprite has a few poses, several different expressions, and main characters have two outfits. There are a few instances of yaoi hands, but most of those are well hidden so unless you’re looking for it you’re not likely going to see it.
Still Picture Rating: ★★★★★ Many detail. Such clean. Very beautiful.
CGs: This is another category that I think really excelled in this game, but typically if the sprite and background art is good, CGs are going to be good, and Café Enchanté was no exception. The only complaint I have is that sizing was sometimes off, giving Kotone the appearance of being 4’2” on some occasions, and 5’6” on others. But since we only know the height of one character, it’s hard to pinpoint where she should be on everyone else. The thing is, these sizing issues were on that one character whose height we know, so that’s the biggest reason I could tell that it was off. We do get many, many opportunities to see the CGs for this game, as they constantly reuse them in flashbacks so much that it kind of gets annoying, but that’s not a hit against the CG portion of this game.
Look at this Photograph Rating: 86%. Super cute CGs that are placed well within the game. Gallery is easy to navigate, and the details in the CGs are very nice.
UI/Mechanics: Café Enchanté is the standard visual novel format with no extra mechanics in the game. It being a Switch game developed by Otomate means it has the same button controls we’re (likely) used to. There is a button map, and the standard extra features that Otomate puts in their games, i.e. skip text, quick save, text backlog, rewind to scene, etc. The UI is well designed, adding flavor to the game with it being designed like a café menu. Although quite cute, it is a little more difficult navigating because no actual identifying names are given, only descriptions based on the LIs. I also found the voices that speak the title of the game are much, much louder than the voices in the game itself, and I’m not sure how to regulate that, since I had game voices turned up as high as they can go, and there was still a disparity.
What’s this button do? Rating: B+. The usual VN with some extra features. I’ve been spoiled recently and have decided an “A” is harder to get now. Attractive design, but a little harder to navigate.
Errors: :sigh: I am honestly overwhelmed at the thought of listing out the issues with Café Enchanté. It’s bad, guys. It’s really bad. It is likely I would have enjoyed the game more if I wasn’t wrestling with the extreme number of errors throughout the text. I can’t say for certain, but it ultimately did color my opinion of not only Café Enchanté, but all games published by Aksys. Normally I’d be the first to pre-order whatever new game is coming out, and now I’m cautiously considering that I might get another Café Enchanté rather than a Piofiore, which should be obvious that I don’t want.
Right, we’re not going to get anywhere if I don’t start. :Shia LaBeouf “Do it!” meme: The amount of text errors is astounding. If I added them all up and spread them out evenly throughout the game, I’m sure that one of every three textboxes was problematic. That’s how numerous the errors were. Missing words, poorly placed punctuation, incorrect capitalization, misspelled words, incorrect words that render the thought a mystery to decipher, stiff translations that caused me to reread several times in order to try to attempt to understand whatever they were trying to convey-- the list goes on. Each route is clearly translated by multiple people, which is fine if it wasn’t so clear due to inconsistencies. Structure of the text, and even referencing ideas and people are different, allowing you to see when the translation was passed from one person to the next. They obviously didn’t communicate how they were going to translate a word or thought and each translator decided on their own style.
Yeah, the game is playable because the errors aren’t game breaking. But this is a visual novel, and as such I expect the novel part to be just as good as the visual part, and it is a far cry from it. The good news is I found the game hilarious. The bad news is that it was hilarious because of the errors and not because it was trying to be funny. I laughed so hard I cried. I laughed so hard I gave myself an asthma attack. It’s so, so bad.
Also, I’m not sure where to put it, but the sound effects for the game are equally hilarious. None of them line up with the text. When someone leisurely walks away, the footsteps they use are quickly paced like someone is running. When someone is quickly making their way somewhere, the sound is a casual amble. When someone comes down the stairs… oh god, it sounds like they’re falling down them and I laughed every time, especially since often the sound effects precede the text explaining what happened. So I hear this series of thuds that seriously sounds like someone ate pavement and then it’s like, “Ignis came down the stairs” and I’m wondering if he’s okay?!
Here there be Bugs Rating: Fail. You do not want to know everything that exists here, it is the worst infestation I’ve ever seen in a game, and it’s from a big named company! I expect better quality assurance when I’m shelling out $50. Ridiculous.
Background Music: It’s nothing special. I recently finished Café Enchanté, literally two days ago, and I can’t recall a single track. I’m sure it worked well with the game; I never felt irritated with it and left it on the entire time, but it’s obviously largely forgettable.
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